The illusion of darkness and the magic of prayers

Tonight, I faced my blindness once again.

I felt like caged in a room with no windows, no doors. I could not see anything outside. It was dark, pitch dark. All I could do was to touch and feel the walls, trying to find an opening desperately. Darkness was growing onto me, and my mind was getting clouded and crowded with thoughts of the worse.

Something inside me was telling me that all is well. This is just a moment of darkness and it will pass. But as the clocked ticked, there were moments where I began to lose faith. I left touching the wall and sat down in the middle of my dark cage, full of anxiety, gloom and suffocation. My hands were still trying to find that last straw to hold on. I had no option. I was losing to that sinking feeling inside me. I was trying to fight the darkness, and was failing every minute.

What is darkness? I asked myself.

Well.... it is the absence of light.

Where is the light?

It is supposed to be all around me?

Then why was I not able to see it?

So what is darkness? Is it the absence of light.. OR... is it the illusion of absence of light? When
the light is omnipresent, how could there be darkness?

I closed my eyes, and looked inside myself, trying to find the source of light, or the way to get away from this illusion of darkness.

And the answer came.

Pray. Talk to God. Ask him your question. Tell him your pain and misery. And leave it to him.

I prayed and opened my eyes. It was nothing less than magic. Pure Magic.

Before I could finish saying my prayer, the room seemed to be brightly lit by light.

Infact, there was no room, no walls, no cage, it was just light.

There was no darkness. I could see clearly that everything was ok. What I wanted most at that moment was there in front of my eyes.

Maybe, since quite some time, I wasn’t praying enough. I wasn’t.

God has given me so much. And God keeps on giving me whatever I ask for. Yet, I was too busy enjoying the gifts he had given me that I moved away from him. And this moving away led to darkness, fears, disbelief and anxiety.

All I had to do is to open my eyes, and the darkness would have vanished. Isn’t it that simple?
In the past too, I had experienced this magical power of prayers, but somewhere the timeline, I became overconfident, and landed up into this illusive darkness. Maybe this small time darkness was to shake me up and remind me how important prayers and faith is.

I apologise to God to losing faith. I have a long way to go, a lot to do.

Thanks for granting me your most precious gem.

Please give me the capability to be worthy of it.

Thank you God.